Noel Gallagher (Photo: Esquire)

While countless nostalgic Britpop aficionados still yearn for the day when Oasis’s Gallagher brothers will once again share a stage — and even younger sibling Liam, who released his debut album As You Were in October, seems more interested in getting back with Oasis than pursuing his own solo career — Noel Gallagher isn’t looking back, in anger or otherwise. Instead, he’s releasing his most forward-thinking, adventurous, and ambitious album yet, Who Built the Moon?, out Nov. 24. A kaleidoscopic, four-years-in-the-making project produced by electronic artist/DJ/film composer David Holmes and drawing inspiration from French jazz, psychedelic pop, soul, disco, ambient music, Brian Eno, and even Kanye West, it sounds like nothing the 50-year-old Mancunian rock idol has recorded before. It doesn’t sound like Oasis, at least.

The elder Gallagher is well aware that the bold sonic departure of his “divisive” third album with High Flying Birds will rankle some old-school fans, aka the “parka monkeys,” and that many of those fans will never give up hoping for an Oasis reunion. But he has no desire to revisit the past — and he claims that his estranged brother doesn’t really want to get the old band back together either.

“I think that Liam knows very well that there isn’t going to be a reunion,” Noel tells Yahoo Music. “So, it gives him absolute immunity to play his fans by saying, ‘I’ll do it!’ He knows it’s not going to happen. So, he can do the little f***ing dance and play to the gallery all he f***ing likes. I can assure you of this: He doesn’t want no reunion either, but he wants everybody to think that he does.”

Nowadays the brothers’ ongoing feud is often instigated by Liam Gallagher’s very active Twitter account, and while Noel prefers to stay off social media, he isn’t shy about bashing Liam in interviews, like Yahoo’s entertainingly mouthy Q&A below. Read on for more of his musings about Liam, the mixed reactions to Who Built the Moon?, the mysterious scissors player and the other women in his new band, and his famously lush head of hair.

Yahoo Music: This album is very different from what people might expect. Some of it, like “She Taught Me How to Fly,” reminds me of the ’90s electronica you did with the Chemical Brothers; “Holy Mountain” brings to mind Plastic Bertrand, even. How did all of this come about?  

Noel Gallagher: To be honest, because the record evolved over four years, I didn’t actually realize how different it was. It was only when I started playing it to people and there was, like, silence after every track that I thought, “Oh. OK.” I guess I knew, in a way, that if there’s a girl singing in French on an album, people are gonna be, you know, a little bit divided about it — apart from the French, of course, who love it! … But the only thing that I thought would be divisive was I put “Holy Mountain” out as the first track that people would hear.

Did that really happen? Like you’d play it for someone, and there’d just be just crickets afterwards?

When I played my management “Holy Mountain” for the first time, the first thing that was said was, “Ohhhh… is it all like this?”

Did that concern you?

No, ’cause I don’t have a record deal. I am my own boss. So I don’t give a f*** what anyone else thinks. I was pretty sure about the songs once I completed them and started to mix them. I’m 1,000 percent behind it. I’m not in any way unsure about it at all.

You’ve said that the “parka monkeys” out there might not dig your new direction. What exactly are parka monkeys? I feel that’s going be a new catchphrase for 2018.

Hopefully it’ll make it into the Oxford English Dictionary at some point. What is a parka monkey? Well, he used to be in Beady Eye [Liam Gallagher’s post-Oasis band], and now he resides on Twitter.

Yes, Liam actually called himself “King Parka Monkey” on Twitter the other day, I believe. He’s owning it, I guess.

So he should. So he should.

Do you follow Liam’s Tweets?

No, I don’t go on social media. It’s a little bit beneath me, to be honest. … There’s not enough hours in the day as it is to f***ing get my s*** done. So I’ll not sit on a f***ing mobile phone, tweeting, or you know, commenting on the world. That’s not how I do things.

Liam somehow seems to find the time.

Yeah. Well, that’s because he doesn’t write any f***ing songs.

I interviewed Liam recently about his own new album, and we didn’t discuss songwriting much.

Well, [if you’d asked him about songwriting] the answer would have contained tumbleweed.

Have you heard Liam’s album? I think it’s very odd, if coincidental, that the two of you are releasing solo records roughly around the same time.

No. I’m not a fan.

It is actually good.

But we don’t strive for “good,” though, do we? We strive for great.

Do you know if Liam has heard your new material?

No, I don’t think he’s heard it yet. But when he does hear it, I trust you will f***ing know all about it.

I do follow him on Twitter, so I probably will.

Well, let me know if he gives it a five-star review, won’t you?

With your two records are coming out just a few weeks apart, it’s almost like Liam’s interviews are promoting your album, since he talks about you so much.

I know, I know. He can’t help it. He’s obsessed with me.

You’ve been pretty blunt about how you feel about a possible Oasis reunion, but in terms of your brotherhood, the personal side of things, is there any relationship left there? Or could it be repaired?

No.

Does that bother you?

I think the whole episode is slightly unnecessary, but that’s just the way that he is, I’m afraid.

It seems like almost every band that could reunite has done so — even Guns N’ Roses, the Replacements, and Led Zeppelin. I can think of only a few bands that haven’t reunited yet and probably never will: the Smiths, the Jam, and now I guess I would put Oasis on that list. Is there anything that would change your mind?

I wouldn’t. I won’t. What would be the point? That’s f***ing awful. I’ve got no unfinished business with Oasis. I don’t mind during my shows looking back when I sing [Oasis] songs for the people that have bothered to show up, but I don’t particularly want to go back and relive it. Because you can never be that guy. Simple as that. It’s like, once you get divorced, you don’t go on holiday with your f***ing ex-wife, do you?

That’s a really good analogy. Is it at all flattering, though, that so many fans still clamor for an Oasis reunion?

Hang on a second. There’s an equal amount of fans who don’t want us to get back together. But they’re less vocal about it. Do you know why?

Why?

Because they’ve got f***ing lives.

All right. I will ask one more question about that, and is has to do with the fact that in a lot of Liam’s recent interviews, he has expressed a strong longing to get back with Oasis. I almost sense a sadness from him, that he really wants it to happen, and doesn’t even want to pursue a solo career…

I think that Liam knows very well that there isn’t going to be a reunion. So it gives him absolute immunity to play his fans by saying, “I’ll do it!” He knows it’s not going to happen. So, he can do the little f***ing dance and play to the gallery all he f***ing likes. I can assure you of this: He doesn’t want no reunion either, but he wants everybody to think that he does.

OK. Going back to Who Built the Moon?, given the fact that it is so different, and that releasing “Holy Mountain” was a risk, what has been the fan reaction overall?

It’s been fascinating. The people that don’t like the album are the people who’ve not heard it — because it’s not out yet! When I put out the trailer of the album, like 10-second snippets of four of the songs, it’s amazing how people were judging it immediately. When that happened, the people in my office were saying, “Oh wow, he seems to have split opinion here.” I thought, “Oh my God. If people don’t like it now, then it’s not going to be much fun for them the next couple of years!” You know, wait till they see the girl with the scissors.

I suppose I should ask about her. What’s the origin story behind that, and what does a scissors player do, exactly?

She is a girl called Charlotte Marionneau, and she is in a band called Le Volume Courbe. In that band, she is the singer, and she also plays the scissors. She is, as far as I know, the only person in the world who plays the scissors. She got them out one day when we were rehearsing “It’s a Beautiful World,” ’cause she did the French [spoken-word] bit, and I thought it was the most amazing thing I’d ever seen.

What did it sound like to you? I mean, I’ve seen the footage of her with you on Jools Holland, but I’m not exactly sure what playing the scissors entails.

You don’t really notice them unless they’re not there.

You sound so galvanized, like you have a new lease on life creatively. Am I correct in thinking that?

Yeah. I think you hear that if you listen to the record. I genuinely feel like I’m at some creative peak. … I think this is my most rock ‘n’ roll album I’ve ever made, and I’ll tell you why I think that. People think that rock ‘n’ roll is about Les Pauls and f***ing drinking Jack Daniel’s at 6 in the morning and all that s***, but to me rock ‘n’ roll is about freedom. It’s about freedom of expression, freedom of thought. That’s why I think this is my most rock ‘n’ roll record, because it’s like it’s not trying to be rock ‘n’ roll. It just is. Because it’s the sound of freedom. It’s almost revolutionary.

That’s amazing. Is there anything that spawned this artistic rebirth for you, like a big life event or epiphany or anything like that?

I looked in the mirror one day, and I thought, “My music now has to be as good as my hair.”

You’ve mentioned your hair in interviews before. You’re very proud of your hair.

Well, wouldn’t you be?

You do have a nice head of hair. You’re very fortunate.

Look, there’s nothing fortunate about it. I’ve been a f***ing good friend to my f***ing hair down the years. I’ve treated it with the utmost respect. Now it’s payback.

What do you do to treat your hair with respect? Do you have a hair regimen? Like, do you take hair vitamins, use a special conditioner?

I can’t let you in on too many secrets. Let’s just say we have a very, very close relationship.

You could probably get an endorsement deal for hair products.

Yeah, I’ve got so much hair, I was thinking of getting rid of a bit of it and inventing a hair removal product called “Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow.” I could maybe go on that program Shark Tank with that.

Beyond that, what are your other future plans?

I’m on tour from February 2018 for almost certainly a couple years. I’ve got a new band, new band members. I’ve got three girls in the band — which will enrage a certain section of my audience, hopefully.

Why do you say that? 

Well, you know what boys are like: “F***ing women? Women in a group? No way, mate, not having it.” So, you know, I’m ready for the ABBA comparisons that are going to be coming my way soon. … To be honest, the record has got such a strong female influence on it; I’d say there’s 37 musicians on this record, and about 15 of them are girls. So it just seemed like a natural order of things that I should get some women involved [in the live shows]. We rehearsed some of the songs and they sounded great with the girls, so they’re gonna be on tour. You know, it adds a different dynamic to your band vibe. I’m not sure my actual band were pleased about it, but f*** them, is what I say.

Why were they displeased?

Like I said, you know what guys are like, right? I mean, my band, they’re not like that, but when I said to them, “You know there’s gonna be three girls on the bus,” they were kinda like, “What?” I was like, “Yup!” So we’ll see how that works out. I’m convinced it’s gonna be f***ing exhausting. Three women? One is exhausting. Two is f***ing mental. Three will just be like, Jesus Christ. I actually will probably look back on this in five years’ time and think back to the time when I started losing my hair.

Well, I hope you don’t, because losing your hair would be an international tragedy.

Yeah. I’d have to f***ing retire then, wouldn’t I?

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This article originally ran on Yahoo Music.

“Twice, yup,” says Gallagher. “A guy calls me who works at Sony Records; he’s a good friend of mine I’ve known for years and years and years. His office was across the hall from Simon Cowell’s. Simon Cowell knew this guy was a friend of mine, and this guy called me up and he said, ‘Simon Cowell’s asking for your phone number, can I give it to him?’ I said, ‘What does he want it for?’ He said, ‘I have no idea.’ I thought he might want a song for one of the X Factor winners. A couple weeks pass, nothing happens and I’ve forgotten all about it, and then one Sunday afternoon this girl calls and says, ‘I’m Simon Cowell’s assistant, is it OK to call you in about five minutes?’ And he offered me the job to replace him when he first left The X Factor. I think to this day I’m still the only person who ever turned him down.”

(A representative for The X Factor tells Yahoo Music that Gallagher was merely “considered,” and was never formally offered a job on the show.)

Gallagher insists that it “wasn’t for any novel reasons about music, blah blah blah and all that” that he said no to Simon and a reported £2 million salary. “It’s for the simple reason that I don’t want to be on TV every Saturday night. [The X Factor U.K. airs on Saturdays.] I’ve got better things to do. And with being on TV every Saturday night comes the endless promotion to do that. And I don’t want to be a TV star, you know?

“I explained all this to Simon Cowell, and I do like him; I’ve met him on several occasions. And he was being very f—ing insistent that it didn’t matter, we could work around [my schedule], we could do it. I said, ‘Well, I’ve got an album coming out.’ He said, ‘Don’t worry about that either.’ I found it mildly amusing for a while and then he said, ‘Well, just think about it and I’ll call you back.’ And I said, ‘I’ve already thought about it, I don’t want to do it,’ and we left it at that.

“But then a year later I got a call, or my management got a call: ‘The album is finished now. Is he in any way interested now?’ But I don’t want to be on TV. Saturday night is for playing with my wife, f—ing getting drunk. It’s my night off.”

Noel Gallagher won’t have many nights off for a while, as he is on tour through July promoting his sophomore album with his band High Flying Birds, Chasing Yesterday. I’m sure he’s got the X factor whenever he’s onstage.

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This article originally ran on Yahoo Music.

Noel Gallagher has made some of the best music of his career (with his new collective, High Flying Birds) since his acrimonious split with brother/Oasis bandmate Liam Gallagher in 2009. And despite the title of his latest album, Chasing Yesterday, he’s looking straight ahead, with seemingly little desire to revisit his Britpop past. He’s not looking back, in anger or otherwise. But that doesn’t stop Oasis fans, even famous ones like Sir Paul McCartney, from speculating and hoping that one day, an Oasis reunion will finally happen.

Yahoo Music recently caught up with Noel during some reflective downtime in his dressing room before his sold-out show at Los Angeles’s Orpheum Theatre, during which he chatted about band reunions, his past vs. present, and if McCartney’s comment swayed him at all. As Noel marks his 48th birthday today (May 29), we know no better way to celebrate than with this epic interview. Let it rip!

YAHOO MUSIC: So I know you have a new solo album, but I have to ask this. One of your heroes, Paul McCartney, recently said in an interview that he thinks Oasis should get back together…

NOEL GALLAGHER: I did read that, yeah.

So, what did you think of that? That’s some pretty major encouragement right there.

Yeah, well, tell him if he writes our comeback single, it’s on. Tell him to write an Oasis track and then we’ll talk. I’ll just put that out there.

How do you feel about this near-constant clamoring for an Oasis reunion, even after all these years?

It’s flattering. It’s funny, in the sense that it really does sum up the British psyche, that when we were together the press couldn’t wait for it to f—ing implode, and then when it did implode, they can’t wait for it to be back together again. I think from a fan’s point of view it’s flattering that people still want it, and then if I’m taking a real overview of it all, I think it’s sad that it’s needed. Because there are no other bands out there for anyone to focus their attention on every week. If we go back to ’94, when we broke, nobody mentioned anybody reuniting — because we were the big s—, and that was it. We didn’t need anybody else, didn’t need the Beatles anymore from the ’60s or the Pistols or any of that, you know? Our generation had its own thing. This generation doesn’t have it, so they harken back to the last one. It’s nice that they’re talking about my group, my songs, but…

Why do you think this is the case?

It’s all because of the Internet, because you can Google nostalgia quite easily… Enough generations grow up looking back, so nobody’s looking forward, you know? My fear would be, is it gonna take for all of us to die, for the next generation of youth to get something for themselves? Is it gonna take the fact that [the legends have] all gone, they’re all dead? But I believe someone must be around the corner, because there’s not a great band to come along for a long, long time now.

Do you really believe that? No one?

There are good bands and some of them write good tunes, but when I mean great, I’m not a barometer of greatness and I don’t define greatness, but we all know that thing. It’s not in the records, because records are subjective. It’s just a thing, and there’s not been a band with the thing for a long time. People make great music, people write great tunes and do great gigs and all that, but really who’s got the f—ing thing? The magic? I don’t see it.

I suppose you have it…

Nah, I don’t think I’ve got the magic. I think I had the magic, but I’m too old for magic now.

So, there will be no Oasis reunion, I assume?

No. I’d do it if I needed the money. If I was broke, I would do it. And I’d be quite frank about that. But I’ve got no need to do it. I couldn’t think of a good enough reason. We could sit and debate and you could throw reasons at me, but musically, what would I want to do that for? I’m not really interested in what fans want. I’m not bothered about that. If you didn’t see us [before], then you didn’t see us. I’ve never seen Nirvana. So f—ing what? The world’s not gonna end. Lots of people never saw the Beatles or the Sex Pistols, and it didn’t make a f—ing bit of difference to music, do you know what I mean? I wouldn’t do it. I don’t need it for the glory; I get enough of that. I don’t need the money. I don’t need the f—ing hassle. I just don’t see a reason. The only reason I would ever do it is if I was broke, or maybe if Liam was broke… And I would f—ing stand in front a room of a thousand people of the press and I would say, “This isn’t for musical reasons. I’m broke, so I need to do it.” And if Liam was broke and he was destitute, then I would f—ing help him out.

OK, let’s change the subject for a second. Since we are discussing nostalgia, what’s the first album you ever bought with your own money? And how did it affect you?

Never Mind the Bollocks, by the Sex Pistols. It still [influences me] to this day. If you listen to the sound of [Oasis's debut album] Definitely Maybe, it’s kind of a bit like that… it had a profound effect on me. I wouldn’t call myself a punk — I was just too young to know what it meant, really, the manifesto, the f—ing political side of it, blah blah blah and all that — but the Sex Pistols’ album is timeless, utterly timeless. You could put it on now and it would still sound like it’s gonna be recorded tomorrow. In any era, if that album dropped on your desk in the morning and it was by a band you never heard of, they would f—ing rule the world. It would rule the world.

Well, when the Pistols reunited, speaking of reunions, not everyone was into that…

Look, I’m not against reunions. I’m not against them at all. I went to see the Stone Roses; I saw five of their gigs. Three of ‘em were all right, two of them were great.

How do you feel about the Kinks supposedly reuniting? Like you and Liam, the core of that band was two brothers who didn’t always get along.

Great! I can’t f—ing wait. I cannot wait. I know Ray [Davies], and I’m so glad that I’ll get to see them. It’s a pity the bass player’s dead and they left it too late, but I’m so glad, because we don’t see enough of Dave Davies and he’s a genius and I want to see him before he dies, or before I die. Hopefully it’ll be great, you know. I guess with reunions, you have to be clear about why you’re doing them. Like the Stone Roses thing, they kind of said they were gonna make a record, and they never made a record and it’s kind of all petered out. If they had just come back and said, “We’re f—ing doing it for the money,” everyone would go, “Great! Here’s some money.”

Stone Roses’ reunion at Coachella two years ago did not go over well…

I suppose [it would be like] if the Jam ever reformed; they were a huge British act that was never big in America, so I don’t know. The Roses were a huge band in Britain, and for them it’s justified going back because they never got to play stadiums to 100,000 people… So for them, it kind of was unfinished business. Oasis couldn’t be any bigger than we were. We couldn’t be any bigger. If we were to announce tomorrow we were gonna do a comeback tour, it could only be as big as the last one. And the last one was f—ing humongous. We couldn’t be any bigger, so there’s no point [of Oasis reuniting], do you know what I mean?

You were quoted once as saying America hated Britpop. Do you really believe that?

Did I say that? When did I say that, was it recently? Well, none of us were very successful here. [Oasis] were the most successful of all the Britpop bands, I suppose, which is understandable, because we were the least British out of all the Britpop bands. Do you know what I mean? Like, Blur and Pulp were very British, very English, and we were a bit more American, really, in the sense that we were more rock ‘n’ roll, I suppose. Yeah, maybe the charts hated us, but the people didn’t.

What are your best memories of the Britpop era, or of the 1990s? And do you miss it at all?

The ’90s? For me personally, just because I’ve done it all now, nothing is gonna happen to me in the next five years that hasn’t already happened to me in my musical life. But from ’94 to 2000, it just f—ing exploded, and each week was different than the next, and each week we sold another million records, and you became a different person because you were then more of a rock star and now you are famous in f—ing Taiwan. It was just this great explosion, whereas now I’ve been world-famous, so unless they invent moon travel and put people on there, there’s nothing else left to conquer, is there? But I like it now. I like the serenity of it all. I like the peace and quiet of what I do now. That’s not to say I didn’t enjoy the chaos and the power of being in a young rock ‘n’ roll band then, because it was truly better than any drug you’ll ever have. And then to add drugs on top of that? Just wow!

If you say nothing new is going to happen to you musically, in the next five years or whatever, what keeps you going, then? What makes you want to keep creating and putting out solo material?

Because I always manage to have a backlog of about 15 songs that I didn’t get around to recording, so at the end of this album I flick through my f—ing notepad — or iPad now, I’m so modern. All the titles, all these finished songs, there’s always about 15 songs, and I don’t wanna die with anything left in the can. So even when I’m on tour, I’m always working to get back in the studio, because if I don’t record these songs then they’ll never get recorded, and I think some of them are pretty good. It’s been an endless cycle of that since as long as I can remember now, always having half a dozen to a dozen songs completed but not yet recorded. And I’m bound by some mythical force that I must record them. And when I record them, I want to go play them, and then another tour gets booked, and then the cycle starts again, and it’s all great. I really enjoyed my last tour because it reminded me in a tiny little way like starting Oasis, because I didn’t know what was gonna happen. So now we’ve arrived here, and I’m liking it. I like being in control of it all. And I like where it’s going and I like the pace it’s going at. It’s nice.

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This article originally ran on Yahoo Music.